Just for one day

There’s no rhyme or reason to it. But sometimes, I just get so incredibly high. Like crazy college nights stoned. I can smoke all day and barely feel it. Like today. To the point that I’m thinking maybe I’m all smoked out. Perhaps it’s time to take a break. And then out of the blue: Blammo. I’m baked out of my gourd.

I have an odd new ritual; well into the evening, usually after 11PM, I’ll take a walk to my local 7-11, which is maybe a half-mile away. I’ll roll a fat joint, and smoke most of it on my walk to the store.

My neighborhood is very residential. Mostly old homes converted into apartment units. Lots of post-college wannabe professionals, young families, that sort of thing. Right down the middle, and quite diverse ethnically and economically.

So the walk is very dark and quiet. It’s rare that I run into another person. If so, they’re generally walking a dog.

By the time I reached 7-11 tonight, I was suuuuper stoned. Grabbed a bottle of Newcastle and an ice cream Snickers bar.

On the walk back I was thinking about this whole situation brewing with “MM.” That’s what I’m going to call the female up in the Bay that I’m about to go hook up with.

There are so many reasons that we work so well; always have. We’re equally twisted on the same shit. We both like to smoke a lot of pot, and we both like lots of dirty, kind of rough sex. Everybody wins.

But now we’ve come to this new place where everything is just so honest. All of the games and posturing of the past are there in the past.

“Give me something to look forward to,” was my plaintive request. “I need it.”

She reeled off a list that definitely gave me what I was looking for. The two of us will be in a secluded house out in the woods. There will be as much marijuana as I can smoke. Literally. And there will be sex. Lots and lots of sex.

If this all sounds too good to be true, well, it kind of is. Because the one thing I’ve left out of this story so far is that fact that this chick is also a mom. This whole sex and weed-filled sex party will be happening in close proximity to a toddler.

Does this all sound horribly irresponsible? I know. But it’s not. Really. She’s an amazing mother to her little girl. I’ve hung out with them before and it’s a real delight. Such a cute little thing.

The plan is that mom and I will hang out during the day, just taking it easy. She swears there’s nothing to do where she is. It’s literally a house in the woods. “People sleep a lot,” she laughs. I’m sure we’ll stay stoned all day long, eat cupcakes, stuff like that.

The kid is in bed by 8PM. And then the adults get to play. Nothing wrong with that.

I know we both need it, and kind of desperately. She’s had nothing but issues with the baby’s daddy, so sex hasn’t really been a part of her life for the past couple of years. And then there’s me.

It’s comforting to know there’s somebody out in the world just as fucked up as me. And she’s just as excited to get naked and exorcise these evil demons that lurk inside cold, crushed wings, smoothed out over and over again, forever dreaming of flying again.