Vacation, pt. 1

Usually I can spot a set-up from a mile away. It was the person doing the setting up that completely threw me. It’s just so not of his nature at ALL. It’s like finding out that Lemmy holds tiny kittens and quietly weeps when no one is around.

So there I was, standing at the bar with him and this kind of hot, kind of hot little woman. Introduced as a “fetish model.” OK, tell me more.

We’re chatting, and this girl is just making 80-yard-Drew-Brees-into-the end-zone passes at me. I’m eagerly catching them, mind you. She’s tiny, but her fire was tremendous. She starts showing me pictures of her fetish model work. It’s the ones of doing ‘suspension,’ or hanging from hooks in the flesh in her back, that I found the most intriguing.

Soon enough, the setter-upper is nowhere to be found. I’m at the bar openly flirting with this woman. At some point we just started making out at the bar. She put her hand on my dick. The bartender gave me a thumbs up. This, ladies and gentlemen, was officially a vacation.